Signs You Have A Dead End Job

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My Trip To The Dollar Store

I went to the dollar store to get some dry erase markers, you know, the ones for white boards. So they had them, but it was a full dollar for each one. Somehow I thought this was a good deal, so I bought 5, and they were ALL DEFECTIVE!!

Oh yeah, so at the cash register I saw a pregency test. Is this an impluse buy? And is it something you want to trust to the dollar store? I dunno about that....

So the best thing I got was this huge can of Arizona Fruit Punch. The can was huge, 695ml. It was red and tasty. I drank 1/2 of it one day, and the other 1/2 the next day.

Old Expressions

For some reason, I got reminded of a dumb expression my parents used to say. They don't make much sense in 2006, but here's a few my parents used to use.

• Grinning like a fox eating shit through tall grass.


• They had to tie a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her.


• He's three sheets to the wind. (drunk) - explanation


• If you're looking for sympathy, you'll find it in the dictionary between shit and syphillis.


• I'm off, like a Jew's foreskin. (when leaving)

Dray Play III

I spoke too soon. I completed the circle level and that was the end of the game. Thank god. I don't know why people play video games, it stresses me out.

Draw Play II

This level got my goat. Those spikey things move, real fast, in a sideways fashion. I did eventually clear it, but it took 20 minutes.


And I have a feeling this level will send me into Draw Play retirement in my first day playing. Yes, those circles spin around.

Draw Play

Here is a game that will frustrate you and cause you to become even more unproductive at work. Enjoy!

Link To Draw Play Game

Update: I learned that if you hold down the mouse button, you can "push" the player straight up w/ your mouse. That made the early levels I was struggling on a piece of cake.

Pressure Cooker

I do everything my friend Joe tells me to. And Joe said I should get a pressure cooker, so I bought one. Now I'm wondering, what the hell am I going to do with a pressure cooker? I don't cook!

And what's up with the warranties on cookware? I've got a 25 year warranty on my pressure cooker. So it's guaranteed to last until I'm 61 years old. Will I be throwing together a split pea soup in 2031?

Amnesty International

A recent report by Amnesty International has concluded that Hizbullah committed serious human rights violations by firing 900 Katyusha rockets filled with a combination of explosives and ball bearings directly into Isreali neighbourhoods.

Gee, I'm glad they cleared that up for us.

Link To Press Release

Bachelor

I know a million other people have said this, but what's one more time going to hurt....

The TV show The Bachelor is on again..."The Bachelor Rome". I'll admit I only watched 5 minutes, but I feel so bad for these women. Like what are they thinking?

These accomplished, tall, gorgeous women haven't even met the guy yet and they're all swooning because the guy is a prince. In this day and age, I would've figured the royalty tag would be viewed as archaic, and even worse, a clear marker that you aren't self-made.

I guess what bugs me the most is the pure capitulation of it all....just to win. How is this viewed as romance? And is it really worth it to make a complete ass of yourself? It's not like the odds are good either, only a 1/27 chance of "winning".

Especially these women....these doctors, these lawyers, and these teachers.....with genes most of us could only dream of having. Is this how they want to be remembered?

Juliet

After I did my Stu post, I realized another friend of mine deserves a post too. My friend Juliet has successfully gone thru a career change (from IT to environmental science), and she's landed her first real job in her new field. (she wasn't happy working in IT, go figure!)

So I think it's fantastic she had the will power to follow thru with her plan (as I know it wasn't easy), and it's another lesson for all of us that we can change our life if we really want to.

Unfortunately, she's leaving Toronto so that's one less (local) friend for me. But I'm happy for her, wish her all the luck in the world, and I know we'll keep in touch.

p.s. last week i found out she knows about this blog...that's why i'm sucking up :)

Stu

Often I feel trapped by my job or my life, but occasionally something will remind me that's it's really my choice to live they way I do.

What I'm talking about is I got a great email from my friend Stu today. See, he's managed to talk his company into letting him work in Costa Rica this winter by telecommuting (he's a copywriter). This is something that a lot of people wouldn't even consider trying, but he asked and they said yes.

Not that this is out of the ordinary, I remember when Stu got laid off from his marketing job a few years ago....the first thing he did was go to Mexico for 3 months. Again, most people wouldn't conceive of taking a long vacation just after losing a job, but for him, it was an opportunity.

So I know I'll never be like Stu, but he's invited me to come down and visit (which is better than spending all winter up here!). So maybe I can share a bit that independence....